scieee AI-readable full text Open interactive document viewer

TOLERANCE AND CONFLICT RESOLUTION ON MARITAL STABILITY OF COUPLES IN EKITI STATE

Ayodele, Christian Junior1*, Kayode, Gladys Modupe2, Adewumi, Damilola Mercy3

Abstract

The study examined the tolerance and conflict resolution on marital stability of couples in Ekiti state. Specifically, the study examined the relationship between tolerance in marriage and marital stability and the relationship between conflict resolution in marriage and marital stability in Ekiti State. This study adopted a descriptive research design of survey type. The population of the study comprised of all teachers who are parent in Ado local Government. A total of One hundred and Twenty (120) samples were selected for this study. A questionnaire titled “Tolerance and Conflict resolution on Marital Stability Questionnaire (TCRMSQ)” was used as the instrument for the study. In order to establish the reliability of the instrument, test-retest method was used to obtain a reliability coefficient of 0.77. Data collected were analyzed inferential statistics of Pearson Product Moment Correlation at 0.05 level of significance. Finding revealed that there is a significant relationship between tolerance and marital stability of couples. The study also revealed that there is a significant relationship between conflict resolution and marital stability of couples. The study therefore recommended that married couples should ensure they build up their tolerance level and share their feelings regularly so that it will help them easily identify areas that need attention in their marriage, couples should try to attend marriage seminars or visit marriage counselors when the need arises and they couples should familiarize themselves with various conflict resolution strategies in marriage.

Full text

Copyright © ISRG Publishers. All rights Reserved. DOI: 10.5281/zenodo.17452589 383 ISRG PUBLISHERS Abbreviated Key Title: ISRG J Arts Humanit Soc Sci ISSN: 2583-7672 (Online) Journal homepage: https://isrgpublishers.com/isrgjahss Volume – III Issue -V (September-October) 2025 Frequency: Bimonthly TOLERANCE AND CONFLICT RESOLUTION ON MARITAL STABILITY OF COUPLES IN EKITI STATE Ayodele, Christian Junior1*, Kayode, Gladys Modupe2, Adewumi, Damilola Mercy3 1 Department of Guidance and Counselling, Ekiti State University, Ado-Ekiti, Nigeria. 2 Department of Adult Education and Community Development, Ekiti State University, Ado-Ekiti, Nigeria. 3 Department of Guidance and Counselling, Ekiti State University, Ado-Ekiti, Nigeria. | Received: 09.10.2025 | Accepted: 14.10.2025 | Published: 27.10.2025 *Corresponding author: Ayodele, Christian Junior Department of Guidance and Counselling, Ekiti State University, Ado-Ekiti, Nigeria. Abstract The study examined the tolerance and conflict resolution on marital stability of couples in Ekiti state. Specifically, the study examined the relationship between tolerance in marriage and marital stability and the relationship between conflict resolution in marriage and marital stability in Ekiti State. This study adopted a descriptive research design of survey type. The population of the study comprised of all teachers who are parent in Ado local Government. A total of One hundred and Twenty (120) samples were selected for this study. A questionnaire titled “Tolerance and Conflict resolution on Marital Stability Questionnaire (TCRMSQ)” was used as the instrument for the study. In order to establish the reliability of the instrument, test-retest method was used to obtain a reliability coefficient of 0.77. Data collected were analyzed inferential statistics of Pearson Product Moment Correlation at 0.05 level of significance. Finding revealed that there is a significant relationship between tolerance and marital stability of couples. The study also revealed that there is a significant relationship between conflict resolution and marital stability of couples. The study therefore recommended that married couples should ensure they build up their tolerance level and share their feelings regularly so that it will help them easily identify areas that need attention in their marriage, couples should try to attend marriage seminars or visit marriage counselors when the need arises and they couples should familiarize themselves with various conflict resolution strategies in marriage. Keywords: Tolerance, Conflict Resolution, Marital stability, Couples, Ekiti State. Copyright © ISRG Publishers. All rights Reserved. DOI: 10.5281/zenodo.17452589 384 Introduction Given that marriage has been seen a religious obligation, it serves as both a social and moral safeguard. In actuality, people desire to live happily ever after when they decide to get married. They desire a devoted, contented, and prosperous marriage. They usually learn that marriage does not sustain itself after they have been married for some time and the novelty has gone off (Esere, Yusuf & Omotosho, 2019). The ability of a marriage to endure because of both the husband and the wife's cooperation is known as marital stability. As a matter of fact, it is believed that marital stability depends on how well one compares their ideal option for a marriage to their final result (Lenthal, 2001). Ineffective communication increases the likelihood that a marriage may fail. For the purposes of this study, it is more significant to note that unstable marriages have been associated with higher levels of negativity and lower levels of positivity, typically manifested as conflicts; negative reciprocity and difficulties breaking free from the negative reciprocity cycle; and verbal and nonverbal communication. In addition to exhibiting increased dominance and withdrawal, criticism, and lack of support and problem-solving skills, unhappy couples also frequently exhibit the demandwithdraw communication pattern, which has been connected to marital discontent and unhappiness (Lazarides & Sabourin, 2017). Marriage instability is impacted by the deep and complex consequences of communication tolerance. When partners are intolerant of one another's opinions or ways of expressing themselves, small disagreements can quickly turn into major arguments that weaken the foundation of the partnership. Couples with high communication tolerance, on the other hand, show tenacity in the face of difficulties, skillfully handling arguments and preserving the stability and happiness of their marriage. Marriage instability is impacted by the deep and complex consequences of communication tolerance. When partners are intolerant of one another's opinions or ways of expressing themselves, small disagreements can quickly turn into major arguments that weaken the foundation of the partnership. Couples with high communication tolerance, on the other hand, show tenacity in the face of difficulties, skillfully handling arguments and preserving the stability and happiness of their marriage. When it comes to contentious matters, tolerance can also mean taking a "let's agree to disagree" position. It does not imply that one must tolerate or condone actions, words, or concepts that go against their morals and convictions. To put it simply, it means that one should always agree to respect and honor one's feelings. When both parties have voiced their viewpoints and it is evident that none of them like shifting their positions, coming to an amicable agreement to disagree is frequently the best course of action. Upon entering into matrimony, a lot of people encounter and acquire the skill of tolerance (Markson, 2016). Tolerance starts with humor. There will be numerous instances after getting married where a man will not comprehend his wife and will grow angry with her. Although it produces skeptical feelings, which are perfectly normal, it is nothing to be concerned about. It seems sense for this to occur when people live in such close quarters with one another. There are numerous approaches to handling this kind of circumstance. One can be very honest with his wife about his feelings, but in reality, what he is experiencing right now is a fleeting anger. It is because he is not seeing enough patients under the current circumstances that he becomes angry out of frustration. Though it's important to keep in mind that everyone makes mistakes occasionally, one should never put up with their spouse. Should he not put this kind of thinking into effect, he is not in a position where marriage is appropriate. An instance when the display of patients is required is when a relationship goes awry or something unforeseen occurs. Such circumstances are chances, and one should seize them and act wisely (Markson, 2016). Two qualities that are beneficial in a married life are tolerance and patience. No matter how much a man loves his wife, there will always be a test of patience and morality in life. It takes a lot of work and compromise for a marriage to succeed, and both the husband and the wife must put in significant effort (Markson, 2016). The term "conflict resolution" in communication refers to arguments or problems that arise in a married relationship but are not addressed or resolved because of poor communication styles or avoidance tactics used by one or both partners. Misunderstandings, arguments, unfulfilled expectations, and emotional distance are just a few ways that these conflicts might appear (Beach, 2021). Unresolved communication disputes can have a variety of repercussions on the relationship and lead to marital instability. First of all, an unresolved argument can cause a breakdown in intimacy and trust between partners. Unresolved issues can cause anger to grow over time and undermine the emotional closeness and trust that are fundamental to a happy marriage. Relationship tension and animosity often rise as a result of unresolved issues. Breakdowns in communication can turn into heated disagreements or silent treatment, which breeds hostility and makes marital problems worse. Over time, this antagonistic environment may exacerbate partners' feelings of estrangement and emotional distance (Poei, 2021). Unresolved communication problems can also make it more difficult to solve problems in a relationship. Issues have a tendency to remain and return frequently when they are not successfully handled and resolved, which feeds the cycle of conflict and discontent. This pattern makes it more difficult for the pair to work together and come up with solutions that work for both of them, which makes them feel frustrated and powerless. Marital stability is greatly impacted by conflict resolution, which is an essential component of married partnerships. Unresolved disputes can lead to discontent and even the possibility of divorce, which is defined as the longevity and quality of a marriage over time. Good dispute resolution techniques can improve communication, encourage understanding between parties, and fortify emotional ties, all of which contribute to marital stability. Any close relationship, including marriage, will inevitably have conflict. It results from disparities in partners' needs, wants, values, and views. Differing from each other, constructive and destructive conflict resolution techniques are the general categories into which they fall. Positive marriage outcomes have been linked to constructive tactics like empathy, problem-solving, open communication, and compromise. According to Gottman (2014), destructive strategies including scorn, defensiveness, stonewalling, and criticism frequently make confrontations worse and are linked to unstable marriages. Resolving conflicts in a way that upholds the connection and fosters respect for one another is known as constructive conflict resolution. Active listening, acknowledging Copyright © ISRG Publishers. All rights Reserved. DOI: 10.5281/zenodo.17452589 385 the partner's emotions, and figuring out solutions that both parties can agree on are important strategies (Bradbury & Karney, 2014). Conversely, destructive conflict resolution can result in a vicious circle of animosity and hostility. The emotional bond between spouses can be harmed by actions like yelling, name-calling, and retreating from conversations. Couples that often resort to damaging dispute resolution techniques are more likely to face marital discontent and divorce (Amato & Rogers, 2017). The core of conflict resolution is effective communication. Finding common ground and understanding one another's viewpoints are facilitated by open, sincere, and sympathetic communication between partners (Epstein & Baucom, 2017). According to Noller and Feeney (2014), poor or nonexistent communication can result in miscommunication and unsolved problems, which can exacerbate marital instability. People differ in their marriage mentalities when it comes to marriage. The first step towards making marriage a reality is adopting a marriage mentality. According to Kefalas, Furstenberg, Carr, and Napolitano (2011), some people marry in order to be viewed as adults, while others wait to get married until they truly feel like adults. Marriages continue to occur despite their often deeply culturally-based motivations. Married individuals typically have committed, mutually fulfilling relationships that last a long time. People are more likely to file for divorce if they were unhappy before being married and continue to be unhappy after marriage (Stutzer & Frey, 2006). Statement of the Problem In Ekiti state, the impact of dispute resolution and tolerance on the durability of marriages is a crucial matter that requires attention. The region may see higher divorce and marital discontent rates as a result of couples' incapacity to resolve disputes amicably and cultivate tolerance in their unions. For the purpose of promoting wholesome and enduring relationships in the state of Ekiti, it is imperative to comprehend how these elements affect marriage stability in order to establish effective intervention measures. This is the background. Purpose of the Study The main purpose of this study is to examine tolerance and conflict resolution on marital stability of couples in Ekiti state. The specific objectives for this study are:  To analyze the relationship between tolerance in marriage and marital stability in Ekiti state.  To explore the relationship between conflict resolution in marriage and marital stability in Ekiti state. Research Hypotheses The following research hypotheses were formulated for this study 1. There is no significant relationship between tolerance and marital stability of couples. 2. There is no significant relationship between conflict resolution and marital stability of couples. Methodology This study adopted a descriptive research design of survey type. The population of the study comprised of all teachers who are parent in Ado local Government. A total of One hundred and Twenty (120) samples were selected in this study. This study comprised of all the teachers in secondary schools in Ado local Government Area of Ekiti state, out of which Five (5) schools was selected using simple random sampling technique, twenty four (24) teachers was randomly selected from each schools to make a total of 120 teachers. A questionnaire titled “Tolerance and Conflict resolution on Marital Stability Questionnaire (TCRMSQ)” was used as the research instrument which is divided into two sections. Section A contained items on the bio-demographic variables of the respondents while section B contained items on the variables of the study. In order to establish the reliability of the instrument, testretest method was used to obtain a reliability coefficient of 0.77. Data collected were analyzed inferential statistics of Pearson Product Moment Correlation at 0.05 level of significance Results Hypothesis 1: There is no significant relationship between tolerance and marital stability of couples. Table 1: Pearson Product Moment Correlation Coefficient showing the relationship between tolerance and marital stability of couples. Variables N Mean SD R Sig. Tolerance 120 5.44 11.75 -0.181 0.105 Marital stability of couples 3.42 6.472 P<0.05 Table 1 shows the relationship between tolerance and marital stability of couples. From the above table, r value is -0.181 is greater than r-table 0.105 level of significant. Therefore, the hypotheses rejected that is, there is negative relationship between tolerance and marital stability of couples. Hypothesis 2: There is no significant relationship between conflict resolution and marital stability of couples. Table 2: Pearson Product Moment Correlation Coefficient showing the relationship between conflict resolution and marital stability of couples Variable N Mean SD rcal sig. Conflict resolution 120 3.734 12.79 -0.157 .000 Marital stability of couples 120 2.321 5.03 p < 0.05 Copyright © ISRG Publishers. All rights Reserved. DOI: 10.5281/zenodo.17452589 386 Result presented in table 2 shows that r-calculated value was -0.57 and the corresponding p-value was 0.00. Since the p-value of 0.00 was < 0.05 level of significance, the null hypothesis was rejected. This implies that there is a significant relationship between conflict resolution and marital stability of couples. In addition, it was revealed that the correlation that exists between the conflict resolution and marital stability of couples was weak and negative. Discussion The results showed a connection between couples’ marital stability and tolerance. Furthermore, the hypothesis that there is a negative correlation between a couple's tolerance and marital stability was refuted. According to Markson (2016), two qualities that a married couple should possess are tolerance and patience. No matter how much a man may love his wife, there will always be a moment in life when his patience and morality will be put to the test. A marriage requires a lot of labor and compromise, and it cannot succeed without the efforts of both the husband and the wife. The results of the study showed a substantial correlation between couples' ability to resolve conflicts and their marital stability. Furthermore, the association between couples' ability to resolve conflicts and the stability of their marriages was shown to be weak and unfavorable. According to Gottman (2014), marital conflict resolution techniques can be roughly divided into two categories: constructive and destructive. Positive marriage outcomes have been linked to constructive tactics like empathy, problem-solving, open communication, and compromise. Destructive tactics, which include defensiveness, scorn, stonewalling, and criticism, frequently make disputes worse and are linked to unstable marriages. Conclusion Sequel to finding of the study, it could be concluded that tolerance and conflict resolution should be adopted in marriage. Tolerance and conflict resolution in marriage influences marital stability of couples in Ekiti State. Recommendations Based on the findings obtained, the following recommendations were put forward: 1. Married couples should ensure they build up their tolerance level and share their feelings regularly so that it will help them easily identify areas that need attention in their marriage. 2. Couples should try to attend marriage seminars or visit marriage counselors when the need arises so as to keep their marriage. 3. Couples should familiarize themselves with various conflict resolution strategies in marriage and learn how to adjust when the need arise REFERENCES 1. Beach, S. R. (2021). Unresolved conflicts of communication in marital relationships. Journal of Marriage and Family Therapy, 47(2), 98-112. 2. Esere, M. O. (2022). Communication as a life wire in marital relationships. Journal of Family Communication, 20(2), 120-134. 3. Esere, M. O., Yusuf, A., & Omotosho, J. A. (2019). The dynamics of marital relationships. Marriage and Family Review, 55(3), 301-318. 4. Esere, M. O., Yusuf, J., & Omotosho, J. A. (2011). Communication and marital adjustment among long-term and recently married couples. Journal of Psychology, 9(2), 112-121. 5. Gottman, J. M. (2009). The marriage clinic: A scientifically based marital therapy. W. W. Norton & Company. 6. Gottman, J. M. (2018). The science of trust: Emotional attunement for couples. New York, NY: W.W. Norton & Company. 7. Gottman, J. M., & Silver, N. (2021). The seven principles for making marriage work. New York, NY: Harmony Books. 8. Kefalas, M. J., Furstenberg, F. F., Carr, P. J., & Napolitano, L. (2011). Marriage mentality: Shifting perceptions and practices. Journal of Marriage and Family, 73(4), 688-704. 9. Lazarides, T., & Sabourin, S. (2017). Patterns of communication in unhappy marriages. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 34(6), 845-860. 10. Lazarides, T., Belanger, C., & Sabourin, S. (2018). Communication and conflict resolution in marriage. Journal of Marriage and Family Therapy, 44(1), 90-104. 11. Lenthal, J. (2001). Marital stability: The interplay of alternatives and outcomes. Journal of Family Issues, 22(5), 621-639. 12. Lenthal, T. (2009). Marital stability and the role of communication. Journal of Family Therapy, 21(4), 345360. 13. Noller, P., & Feeney, J. A. (2002). Understanding marriage: Developments in the study of couple interaction. Cambridge University Press. 14. Poei, E. J. (2021). The role of unresolved conflicts in marital instability. Journal of Couple and Relationship Therapy, 20(3), 215-230. 15. Stutzer, A., & Frey, B. S. (2006). Marriage and happiness: A cultural perspective. Journal of Economic Behavior & Organization, 58(3), 258-269.